People and Things, a mother-daughter Blog

November 19, 2008

The Other Night-Anna

Filed under: Lonliness — peopleandthings @ 3:03 am

Outside I sit. Friends all gathered around, laughing in conversation. I can hear their voices in the background as I think of you. My hand on my shoulder, wishing it was yours. I long to feel your touch again. The cool air breezes past my face and I look to the sky. I feel I will walk out again into the dark and sit alone.

We gather inside for more group conversation and I can feel tears rising. I then tune in to the people around me and hold them in.

Soon the room is empty. Everyone has gone to bed with the one they love and I am left on the sofa; alone.

Alone again, I venture out to the stars. Listening to soft classical music, I sit on the edge and watch the trees sway in the wind. Each branch moves with each lyrical note. The evening brings in the cool air to grace my face and give me chills. The sky then enchants my gaze as I wonder if you see what I see. One star constellation sticks out in my mind and my memories. The Big Dipper, a sight for sore eyes.

How I wished to be with you. Be held by you. Be safe and warm in your embrace. Try as I might the tears gather again only to pour out. One tear, then two. If only I could enjoy the sound of your comforting voice. My anxious heart feels with excitement and wonder. I then begin to visualize the future and what it may hold. My life with you in all our glory. Imagining our picnic on the soft sandy beach and how you would hold me while we watch movies.

Then three months later. I can see you dressing the part. Me in my fanciest attire. We walk into the room almost like we own the place. We fit.

Now inside gazing at he ceiling and wondering what time it may be. Still listening to the music, I lay my head flat and finally fall asleep. It was four a.m. and my mind was of you. As my eyes closed my mind stayed open; dreaming.


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